TBT- Time is never on sale. Get It While You Can!

One year ago, (now 3) I drove across town with the boys in blissful ignorance of what the day would bring. We were on a mission to find post-Thanksgiving donuts to round out our holiday gluttony. As we passed the lake; I saw that it was on the cusp of solidity, a magical phase that only lasts…

The Best Dad In The World.

I have spent the last two years processing my own dad’s death.  Publicly and privately.  Fatherhood has been constantly on my mind. His birthday was always around (and even some years ON) Father’s Day and so the day has always seemed custom made for him. But for this fathers day I will mark the event with a tribute…

The Scattering Part 3-Making Mud Pie With Daddy. Literally

My sister and I were raised by a rabid surfing gang referred to by its members as Team Squeam.  Our parents were the only ones in this group of free spirited hippy surfers, to have children.  Since there were only the two of us; it was easy to hand us down cliffside or piggyback us up…

On The Road Again

Since my dad passed two years ago a great many things have changed. Most of these differences have nothing to do with my dad or his death.  In some ways that makes his absence that much more surreal.  In the uncharted country of time yet to come, my lack of a father rarely seems to have any measurable…

A Question For My Dead Father…

Over the past two years, I have come to fully appreciate why people call it “the grieving process.”    After the initial shock and adjustment,  a long and winding road unfurled into the future.  I have started to adapt to my new fatherless state. Now: I remember that I can’t call him- before I reach for my phone to try.

Time is never on sale. Get It While You Can!

One year ago, I drove across town with the boys in blissful ignorance of what the day would bring. We were on a mission to find post-Thanksgiving donuts to round out our holiday gluttony. As we passed the lake; I saw that it was on the cusp of solidity, a magical phase that only lasts a…

Throwback Wednesday (Yes, I am THAT impatient!)

I wrote this two years ago after our trip back home for our West Coast wedding blessing ceremony.  It was the first time we got to show the boys where they were born and the last time they saw my dad, their “Grandpa Wise-man” (a title he gave himself for his step-grandkids) Looking back I…

The places I found you.

I went for a dive today, hoping to find you along the way. I took the back roads and chose the path. Hoping to find you somewhere, maybe on some mountain’s pass. What I discovered was exactly as I had feared. That you were no longer here, but I knew that from the start.